Kiss With A Fist

I feel awkward.
That's the best way that I can describe it.
Not my happiest, but certainly not sad.
Indifferent?
I don't know.

Have you ever experienced feeling, dare I say it?
Replaced?
Within any situation.
Mine in particular, is friendship.
Here let me explain
I guess I'm just not used to it.
Having so many people around me all the time that know my name and care about what I think.
Friendship wise.
I'm used to flying solo and only having one or two extremely close friends.
Which is quite depressing when I think about it to hard.
I had friends and people who I liked talking to.
But only a small handful I considered close friends.

I guess I'm just scared.
Scared of losing my place.
A place in what exactly, I'm not to sure of.

I guess I'm scared of being forgotten.
Of being left behind or not being taken into consideration.

It's happened before.
That's why I'm scared.
I'm just scared of it happening again, because I really like everyone I know here at school.
I don't want to lose my place.
If that makes any sense to you.

Maybe this is just me being paranoid.
But I can't help feeling like this on somethings.
Like becoming an afterthought almost.
I don't know.