"You Are Gorgeous."

What makes a person attractive?
Is it their hair or their eyes?
Or how they carry themselves in situations?

What makes a person look at another person and think to themselves, "wow."
What triggers that reaction of thinking about the future?
And how do you know if you met the person you were supposed to be with?

Do you only have one "soulmate"?
If thats true, what happens if something terrible happens before you meet?
Or what if forces beyond your control get in the way of "what could have been"?

And then of course, there is the whole willingness to even try.
But thats a whole other set of questions.

But taking into consideration all my questions...
Hypothetically speaking:
I happen to one day be walking out of the store and I bump into someone.
We exchange the normal awkward apologies.
Humans are very intimate creatures, so touching is seen as very special.
Thats why if you almost run into someone, you both back quickly away and stutter apologies.
Not because you might run into them, but you might touch them and that is invading the person space of someone, which also leads to the fact that people are very considerate (most of the time) about personal space of others.
Anyway, so what happens now?
You walk away.
And thats it.
But... how do you know that you didn't just run into your future spouse or possible greatest friend for life?
Chance meetings happen like this all the time and people ignore them.
All just because it happened in a split second and with the knowledge that you will never see this person again.

But what if you do see this person again?

Optimism will be the death of me.
And I am actually alright with that.

I'm Gonna Watch You Shine.

I sat here for like 20 minutes trying to think of something to write.
It still isn't working.

...I'm eating pasta for dinner tonight.
It's going to taste so yummy.
My average-ness is so un-startling.

Way Hay And Up She Rises..

Being an adult is expensive.

Birthday Shout Out!

Happy Birthday To You!
Happy Birthday To You!
Happy Birthday Dear Grandma!!!!!!
Happy Birthday To You!

I would have preferred to call you, but I figured that this would be an alright "next best" thing.
I love and miss you and I hope you've been having a nice time, I'll make sure to call you as soon as I can!

Love, Allyson

El Burro Es Un Animal Importante.

Whenever I hear people talk about my Grandfather, they always mention his laugh.
It wasn't just a laugh.
It was a way of living.
When Grandpa laughed, it was a show all on it's own.
It could easily be heard across the room.
But I know you could hear it across the country if you tried hard enough.
His face would squinch up to the point where his smile would completely overtake his features.
It was like an explosion of happiness.
This from-the-depths-of-the-belly laugh, which I can only describe as the human personification of a sonic boom, resulted in earsplitting goodness.

I miss that laugh.

When we lived back in Ohio, I remember always wanting to spend the night at Grandma and Grandpa's big blue house.
Yes being with them was wonderful and I loved it when Grandma would wake us up for breakfast, but my favorite part was always shaving time.
The feeling of squishing Grandpa's white shaving cream on my fingers and all over my face are some the best memories I have of their house in Ohio.

Being the youngest I always had to take naps.
At the time of course, I didn't realize how good I had it.
After waking from my forced daily coma, I would always try to make unnecessary noise.
This insured that the grownups downstairs knew that I, sleeping beauty, had awoken from my slumber and was ready to be let out.
Grandpa always came to get me and would let me piggyback all the way down the stairs to parade me around.

I miss the piggybacks and shaving cream.

Grandpa was a very religious man.
He was going to be a lawyer at first, but due to my Grandmother's faith and influence, he changed his career from a life of reading court documents to a life of reading the Holy Bible.
My Grandpa couldn't hold a music note to save his life, but that didn't stop him from belting it out like Aretha Franklin.
I just wish I could have had a conversation with him about God, because I don't think I ever did.
If only I had understood God and church a little bit sooner in life..

I miss the off-key singing.

Grandpa got very sick.
They called it "Dementia".
I had never heard of it before then.
But I was told that he wasn't able to remember things as well anymore and he wasn't going to get better.
It makes me sad sometimes that I have all these memories of Grandpa from when I was younger, but Hannah and Nicholas won't.
I just don't want them to forget him.
Because he is such an unforgettable man.
And on top of that, he was a very great person and an even better Grandfather.

But I don't want to miss him too much, he is seeing his mother and father again and having conversations with God after all.
And I know that I will see him again.

But I can't help missing him.